Comfortable in my Own Skin

“I’m comfortable in my own skin, no matter how far I’ve stretched it.”

-Dolly Parton- (in an October 2023 interview with Norah O’Donnell)

Comfortable in my own skin. Such a feeling was pretty much unattainable in my youth and as I drank through my teens and early twenties. It has been slow in coming in the decades since, but it is sure worth it now.

Dolly Parton and I couldn’t be less alike in terms of make-up and attire, but she is also unapologetically herself, an amazing writer, and from very humble beginnings. All of these things shape who she is and give her a genuineness that shines through any amount of make-up, facelifting, glitzy outfits.

Dolly also has said “It takes a lot of money to look this cheap.” She sleeps with make-up on, in case something happens in the night. She has an image to uphold. In a way, this much effort saddens me. But then I smile at her sense of humor and I remember her early life, and I think she is a wonderful and energetic survivor. She didn’t stay a poor victim.

Thrive or stay stuck. This is really a daily choice. Decades of recovery work, and more recently mindfulness and meditation, help me thrive. And help me loosen the grip of toxic or unhealthy thoughts that used to be able to take hold and pull me under. To go from hating the person reflecting back at me in the mirror to smiling at her and sending her love and compassion has been a real journey.

A patient and loving Higher Power, supportive family and friends, a recovery community, daily work, living gratefully practices, running, walking, writing—these are my beauty products, so to speak. And hydration too, of course.

Thank you Dolly, for your hard-earned perspective. Mine has been hard-earned too, but riches abound.